Why Pain Might Be the Best Thing God Ever Allowed in Your Life (Part 3 of 4)
Part 3: Why Pain Might Be the Best Thing That’s Ever Happened to You
Let’s be honest… none of us want pain.
We avoid it. Numb it. Pray it away. We pop Advil at the first sign of a headache and do everything we can to live comfortable, pain-free lives.
But then we scroll our feeds or sit through a movie, and what are the stories that grip us? The ones where people go through fire. The stories of resilience, comeback, courage. The stories where pain didn’t get the final word, but shaped someone into something new.
Maybe we’re drawn to those stories because, deep down, we know they’re true. We know growth comes through pain.
We just don’t want it to be our story.
This post is part of the “God in the Pain” series:
Pain Has a Purpose
In early 2021, I thought I was stepping into the most exciting season of my life.
My wife and I had sensed God calling us to plant a church in Colorado. We went through the training, picked a city, raised support, said our goodbyes, and stepped into the unknown with confidence that God would do something big.
But almost immediately, that excitement was swallowed by anxiety—crippling, persistent anxiety that I’d never experienced before. It didn’t stop. Counseling, prayer, and exercise, nothing seemed to help.
Then came the move. Then disappointment. Then silence. Over the next three years, every door we knocked on slammed shut. I was exhausted, alone, burned out, and empty. Eventually, we shut it down, not because we had a next step, but because we had nothing left.
I was confused. Hurt. Angry. I felt like God had abandoned me. Or worse, that He was watching me collapse and just didn’t care.
But slowly, painfully, I started to realize something. God wasn’t punishing me. He was pruning me.
The pain wasn’t pointless. It had purpose. And it wasn’t coming from a cruel taskmaster—it was coming from a loving Father who saw something in me that needed to be reshaped.
Growth = Pain
A few years ago, I read Leadership Pain by Samuel Chand. In it, he writes:
“Growth = Change
Change = Loss
Loss = Pain
Therefore, Growth = Pain”
He was talking about leadership, but honestly, that’s just life. And it’s absolutely the story of following Jesus.
Think about it. How do you grow in wisdom, strength, resilience, compassion, or faith? Not through ease. Not through applause. Through hardship. Through pruning. Through pain.
And this isn’t some weird spiritual masochism, it’s biblical.
James writes, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” (James 1:2–3)
Paul echoes the same in Romans 5:3–5: “Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
Pain has the power to do what nothing else can, it grows us. It forms something deep inside of us that comfort never will.
An Unusable Block of Marble
Michelangelo’s statue of David is considered one of the greatest masterpieces in human history. Towering over 17 feet tall, carved from a single block of marble, it depicts a moment of quiet strength just before David went to battle with Goliath.
But what makes the story behind it even more powerful is how it began. Decades earlier, this block of marble had been rejected by other artists. It was deemed too flawed, too brittle. It sat outside, weathered and forgotten, until in 1501 a 26-year-old Michelangelo saw what no one else could. He spent two years studying the stone, sketching, measuring, and carving. And in the end, he created what many call the most perfect statue ever created.
When asked how he approached his work, Michelangelo is often credited with saying, “The sculpture is already complete within the marble block, before I start my work. It is already there, I just have to chisel away the superfluous material.”
Think about that. Every chisel, every precise strike of the hammer revealed a little more of David. Michelangelo didn’t rush it and it wasn’t random. It was deliberate, disciplined, painstakingly slow.
He likely spent days refining a single muscle. Hours shaping the curve of a fingernail. He saw what no one else saw and then gave his life to revealing it. That’s what made David a masterpiece. Not just what was created, but the care and attention it took to uncover it.
That’s a picture of what God does with us.
You might feel broken. Rejected. Unusable. But God sees what’s underneath. And through the pain, little by little, He chisels away everything that doesn’t belong.
It’s not easy. It’s not fast. But it is good.
The Danger of a Pain-Free Life
Some people are born with a rare condition called CIPA—congenital insensitivity to pain. They literally feel no pain.
You’d think that would be a blessing. But it’s not, it’s deadly.
Children with CIPA often suffer injuries that their parents only discover once the damage is done. A broken bone. A burn. An infection. Without pain, there’s no warning. No signal that something is wrong.
Pain, as awful as it feels, is a gift. It tells us something is off. It protects us. It draws our attention to deeper issues. And it invites us to heal.
The same is true spiritually. Pain in our soul is often the warning sign that something deeper needs attention. That something broken needs to be healed.
Pain as a Teacher
One of the most important things I’ve learned (and am still learning) is this: pain is not the enemy. My reaction to pain might be. My refusal to listen might be. But pain itself? It might be the very thing God uses to shape me.
The Bible is full of people who were formed through pain:
- Moses was shaped in the desert.
- David was shaped in caves.
- Elijah in loneliness.
- Paul in prison.
- Jesus in Gethsemane and Golgotha.
Even Jesus didn’t get to skip pain. Hebrews 5:8 says, “Although he was a son, he learned obedience through what he suffered.”
If that was true for Him, how much more for us?
Two Things Pain Teaches Us
1. Pain Produces Depth
Anyone can follow Jesus when things are going great. But what about when the lights go out? When the healing doesn’t come? When the silence stretches for months?
That’s when faith grows deep. That’s when the roots go down. That’s when we stop following God for what He gives and start following Him for who He is.
2. Pain Draws Us to Presence
Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
There’s something about pain that thins the veil between us and God. When everything else is stripped away, we often discover He was closer than we ever knew.
What Do We Do With Pain?
If pain is unavoidable, and if God uses it for good, how should we respond?
1. Don’t run.
That’s what I tried. Numb it. Fix it. Ignore it. But when we run from pain, we often miss what God wants to do through it.
Ask better questions. Instead of “Why is this happening?” try:
- “What is this pain revealing in me?”
- “What is God trying to form in me through this?”
- “How can I walk through this, not around it?”
2. Stay rooted.
This is when you need truth more than ever. Surround yourself with people who will carry you when you’re weak. Pray, even if it feels like shouting into the void. Sit with Scripture, even if the words don’t sink in yet.
God isn’t offended by your pain. He’s present in it.
3. You Are Not Alone.
I used to think the greatest adventure of my life would be planting a church.
And it was an adventure, just not the kind I imagined. It wasn’t a story of instant fruitfulness. It was a story of being broken open. Of pain I didn’t ask for, and growth I didn’t know I needed.
But through it all, God was writing something deeper. Maybe that’s what He’s doing in you, too.
Coming Next: 4 Reasons Why God Allows Suffering
So far we’ve explored the tension, the biblical witness, and the surprising benefit of pain. But we still haven’t fully answered the hardest question: If God is good, why would He allow suffering in the first place? That’s where we’re going in Part 4.
But until then, here’s the reminder I keep coming back to:
God isn’t punishing you.
He’s pruning you.
And He’s not done yet.
Still wrestling with suffering?
God in the Pain is a free 7-day devotional I wrote to help you keep processing what you’re going through—with Scripture, honest reflection, and real hope.
If this post spoke to you, this devotional is your next step.
Download it free and let God meet you in the middle of the pain.
