The 5 Craziest Verses Found in the Bible

I hear a lot of people complain about how boring the Bible is. Apparently they haven’t read the following verses. Here are the top 5 crazy, weird, and disturbing verses in the Bible.

I will make them eat the flesh of their sons and daughters, and they will eat one another’s flesh because their enemies will press the siege so hard against them to destroy them. Jeremiah 19:9

Whoa. And disgusting.

This is God speaking to Jeremiah in this text. He is telling him to go to Topheth where they had stopped following God and started following Baal. They had been warned and did nothing. Now it’s judgement time, and God doesn’t soften the blow in the least bit.

There is actually something in this verse for us today. We often view our sin in a trivial sense and forget the seriousness. God doesn’t view sin as a laughing matter. Our sin has consequences. It’s our sin that put Jesus on the cross.

A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. Stopping her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or trying to hold something with greased hands. Proverbs 27:15-16 

That’s just funny… And true.

Now if I were to say something like this I’m going to get in trouble. But Solomon, the wisest man ever to live, can get away with it.

Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks. Psalm 137:9

Yes this a real verse. And it has to be one of the most disturbing verses found in the Bible.

If you were to read through Psalms you would find several different styles. This one is an Imprecatory Psalm, and it’s probably one of the harshest. These Psalms invoke judgment and calamity on the enemies of God. This verse, and really all of Psalm 137, is written against the enemies of Israel.

The verse prior gives us a little hint about what is going on. In verse 8 the writer writes that they will be repaid according to what they have done. In other words these guys have done some pretty bad things. And the Psalmist is saying that what they did will be done to them.

While this verse can catch us off guard, we’ve got to read the whole passage and not just draw our conclusions from one verse.

Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth, and it said to Balaam, “What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?” Balaam answered the donkey, “You have made a fool of me! If only I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now.” The donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?” “No,” he said. Numbers 22:28-30

Balaam has this donkey that won’t seem to cooperate so he beats it, 3 times. Little does he know God is trying to get his attention. If God ever speaks to you through your donkey it’s probably best to listen. What’s crazy about this story is Balaam doesn’t even seem phased by his talking donkey. He even threatens to kill it!

Moral of the story, listen the next time your dog speaks to you. Okay that’s not the real point of the story. The actual point is that God’s story will come to fruition despite our best efforts.

For space I did not include the whole passage, you can read that here: Numbers 22:21-41

Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to the foreigner residing in any of your towns, and they may eat it, or you may sell it to any other foreigner.  Deuteronomy 14:21

I guess there’s no roadkill for dinner tonight. Well, except for our guests.

While this may seem commonsense, I don’t know anyone that goes around picking up dead things and eating them. Although I have seen a few people on tv… There is an important lesson in here. Don’t force your customs on those that aren’t following God.

We like people to act like Christians even though they aren’t. The problem with people that don’t know Jesus isn’t what they do, eat, or act like. The problem is that they don’t know Jesus. Don’t force the world to look like Jesus. Be like Jesus to them. Love them, care for them, but don’t force them to follow God before they even know who He is.

Check out: The Top 3 Most Misunderstood Verses

What would verses would you add to the list?

Jeffery Curtis Poor
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